Motivation from the Car: Now on YouTube

Author Gary A. McAbee “Mr. Intangible”

What is Motivation from the Car?

Motivation from the Car is a series of self-help videos I create while I sit in my car. If you know me well, you would know that I do my best work in my car. I think clearly. I see clearly. I gain insights and understand things a lot better while I am sitting or driving my car. So I thought, why not put these interesting moments on video to share with the world?

The Motivation from the Car video series can be found on my YouTube channel. It consists of videos that provide a small dose of motivation any time you need it. These short one-minute videos allow me to  discuss topics like having patience, staying away from comparison, and avoiding the Monday morning blues. Take a look at these three videos for a sample of motivation from the car, Gary McAbee style!

Celebrate YOU! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sUhKGcmrjAA

You Gotta Believe https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5cSfjhJLZfQ

Be Kind to Others https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XIiGpcNOiGs

Motivation from the Car, brought to you by Author Gary A. McAbee on the Motivation for the World YouTube Channel. Please like my videos, subscribe to my channel, and learn what Motivation for the World is all about!

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Take Care of Your Self

Self T shirt

Self-worth

Do you know what you are worth? You should understand that you were created differently than every other person. This means you are special, unique, and gifted in ways that no one else can claim. If you ever question your self-worth, find someone that believes in you or something that reminds you of your talent. Your worth is infinite.

Self-esteem

Once you know your worth, you must work on how you feel about yourself. Who do you see when you look in the mirror? You should see someone who is good as is regardless of your situation or circumstances. You must believe are important, respected, and loved. Ind things that help you build up your self-esteem. You must believe you are worthy.

Self-talk

Pay attention to the things you say about yourself to yourself. Do you tell yourself good things or bad things? Remember, you are always talking to yourself and always listening to what you say. Therefore, the things you say must always be uplifting. Your self-talk must be encouraging so that it helps you remain positive and upbeat.

Self-care

You must start by taking care of your needs first. This includes your physical, mental, and spiritual needs that affect your health. You must take care of your body by monitoring what you consume. You must also take care of your mind by absorbing things that will benefit your health and well-being. No one should be more invested in your self-care than you.

Self-confidence

You must understand that you have what you need to be successful. You are good enough. Build self-confidence by reminding yourself who you are and what you can do. Use your self-talk.  It takes a lot of positive energy to come to this realization. Next, act on it so that you can move forward. Being more self-confident requires getting out of your comfort zone and taking action.

Self-respect

Develop a code of ethics that you will not cross. This is how you respect yourself. Avoid situations you know are not good for you. This includes people, certain places, and activities that will lead you astray. Listen to your conscience: that inner voice that tells you what’s right and what’s wrong. It will help you keep your self-respect intact.

Self-awareness

It is important to know how your behavior affects people and situations. Are you doing the right things? Are you saying the right things? How are people reacting and responding to you? You have a filter that tells you if your words and actions are appropriate and properly received. Use it. Again, listen to your inner voice for guidance.

Self-control

We all have limits and boundaries. It takes a great deal of energy to stay within those limits. Our world is full of temptation. Try not to fall victim to things that are attractive, but not necessarily good for you. It is a constant struggle. Yet staying in control allows you to focus on the things you need to do and say. No one can do this for you.

Self-improvement

By nature, we are all flawed individuals. The first step to self-improvement is recognizing this fact. Even if you have expert-knowledge, there is something else you can learn. There is also someone who knows more than you. Therefore, we all should seek ways to get better. Education and learning are processes that should never stop. Neither should your desire to get better. 

Self-help

There are so many ways to seek knowledge. There is plenty of book knowledge. The internet has an endless amount of information.  There are people can learn from too. However, the only way to learn is to seek.  Self-help requires you to get out there, look for information, test it, and use it as needed to improve your life and your experiences. You must learn and continue to learn for the rest of your life.

Self-education

The formal education offered in our school system is not enough. You must embark on teaching yourself. A good place to start is through external sources. Read everything. Another part of this process is learning from your personal experiences. See everything. No one else can see these lessons from your viewpoint. They are invaluable. What did you learn today?

Self-direction

You should know what direction your life is taking, and where you want to go in the future. Do you have a short-term plan for your life? Do you think about where you want to be 5-10 years from now? Without an idea, you will not be able to direct yourself toward the future you seek. Write down goals. Give yourself deadlines. This is how you move forward and in the right direction.

Self-reflection

A part of this process is taking time to honestly assess where you are and what you are doing. Are you on the right track, or off-course? This is a great time to review your goals and plans for making them happen. Reward yourself when you hit your target. Learn and improve when you don’t. Commit to trying again. Giving up if you don’t like what you see is not an option. Instead, redirect, refocus, and recommit.

Self-sacrifice

To get what you want, sometimes you must give something up for a cause bigger than yourself. You might have to help someone else get what they want, as a lesson to help you later. You might need to pause your efforts, to meet immediate needs. Often, the times you sacrifice your needs, you get time to see things from a different perspective. You get time to rest during your personal journey, temporarily, when you help others. Look for these opportunities.

Self-sufficient

In the end, the only one who can help you is you. You must learn how to depend on yourself. Learn how to support yourself because sometimes that’s the only support you will get. Taking care or yourself requires learning what you need when you need it. Next you must figure out how to satisfy your needs. You must also pat yourself on the back and pick yourself up when you fall short. Remember, you have been given everything you need to take care of yourself.

Self-employment

You are your boss. You work for you. Now that you know this, how can you be highly productive so you can be successful? Your life is your job, and the only one who can guide you is you. The only one who pays you is you. The only one who is responsible for your outcomes is you. Take care of yourself so that you can do a great job for yourself. You are self-employed.

Take care of yourself!

I CREATED THE MOTIVATION FOR THE WORLD BLOG TO HAVE A POWERFUL VOICE AND POSITIVE IMPACT. THE ARTICLES POSTED ARE FOR ALL PEOPLE WHO ARE SEEKING BETTER RESULTS, SELF-IMPROVEMENT, AND LIFE-CHANGING SUCCESS. ALONG WITH MY OTHER BLOG, WAKE UP/RISE UP, I GET PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT ISSUES THAT AFFECT US ALL.

I AM THE PROUD AUTHOR OF THREE SELF-HELP BOOKS: WAKE UP! 42 WAYS TO IMPROVE BLACK AMERICA NOW!, THE FOLLOW-UP RISE UP! 42 ADDITIONAL WAYS TO IMPROVE BLACK AMERICA NOW! , AND DEFINING SUCCESS: ONE WORD AT A TIME.

THANK YOU FOR VISITING MY BLOG!

GARY A. MCABEE

 

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Body Language 101: Making Great First Impressions that Last

Body Language 101: Making Great First Impressions that Last

Handshake

Everyone must master the subtle art of improving our body language to promote a better image in our society. Body language speaks volumes about how a person is feeling, their outlook on life, and how they conduct their business. A concept directly related to body language is making a first impression. First impressions are extremely important; those who leave good impressions will be more likely to achieve success than those who do not.

There are many skills that will improve our body language. When combining proper body language with using proper English and dressing for success, there is no doubt that African Americans can compete, and win in any situation.  We simply need to master the skills that so many high achievers use to guarantee their success. The following skills are keys to improving our body language.

Demonstrate Good Posture

We should stand up straight and hold our head high. When sitting, we should lean slightly forward and be sure to be upright without slouching. These actions show confidence. They present a positive outlook and give off a good first impression.

Maintain Proper Eye Contact

Those who make good eye contact are perceived as trustworthy. We should learn how to look others directly in the eye when speaking. This is especially important when we are trying to make a favorable impression.

Give a Firm Handshake

A firm handshake shows confidence. It also shows strength and eagerness. Those who give firm handshakes are taken seriously and they are well respected.

Use Proper Hand Gestures

Hand gestures suggest excitement and energy. When speaking, use proper hand gestures to make points clear and emphasize ideas. Be careful not to constantly move the hands because it portrays nervousness. Use hand movements that come naturally; do not force them.

Add Appropriate Responses

When engaged in conversations, use appropriate responses that include both verbal and non-verbal reactions. Such reactions include appropriate facial expressions, short pauses before speaking, and verbal responses to show that you are listening. Proper responses lead to more meaningful conversations.

Don’t Forget to Smile

A smile works regardless of the situation at hand. It disarms people and gives the most positive response. Those who smile often are more likely to demonstrate their positive outlook. People tend to respond favorably to people who smile.

Each of these concepts will allow us to give off the correct body language and make better impressions. Everyone should put these things into practice immediately. They could be the difference between opening doors to new opportunities or closing doors to lost opportunities.

 

Gary A. McAbee created the Motivation for the World blog to have a powerful voice and positive impact in society. The articles posted are relevant to all people who hope to improve their lives and unlock their unlimited potential. Along with his other blog, Wake Up/Rise Up, Gary is able to get people talking about issues that affect us all. He is the proud author of three self-help books: Wake Up! 42 Ways to Improve Black America Now!, the follow-up Rise Up! 42 Additional Ways to Improve Black America Now! , and Defining Success: One Word at a Time.

 

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My Moses Complex

Promised Land

In my life I have taught many students how to lead more productive and successful lives. My books about self-motivation and self-determination have been read by many adult learners seeking to improve their lives. The inspirational quotes and motivational prints I have created have been used by many people looking for a daily dose of encouragement and support. The advice I have given has empowered many individuals to persevere instead of giving up. In short, I have provided motivation for the world, one person at a time. I believe I have led a lot of people to their Promised Land.

Despite this, I have an eerie feeling that I am supposed to watch people cross over into the Promised Land, but I am not supposed to cross over with them. I call this my Moses Complex. If you know the story of Moses, you know that he led the Israelites out of Egypt. Along the way, he fought for the Israelites. He received the Ten Commandments and taught the Israelites. He led the Israelites through the wilderness to the Promised Land. Yet he was not allowed to enter with them. Instead, when his earthly duties were completed, he was taken up into heaven.

I don’t want this comparison to be misconstrued. I am not Moses, nor am I a leader of his magnitude. However, I do think my life has elements of Moses’ story and his “journey.” Just like Moses, I think I have been called to lead people to their Promised Land. Moses answered a call that encouraged him to become a leader. I answered a call that encouraged me to become a teacher. Moses had doubts about his ability to lead. I had doubts about my ability to lead. Moses motivated and inspired people to move forward against all odds. I motivate and inspire people to move forward against all odds. Moses saw the Promised Land, but did not cross into it. I saw the Promised Land…

Here is where my confusion lies. Am I going to enter the Promised Land, or am I on this earth to be the conduit that allows others to get there? Sometimes it feels like I will never get there. My Promised Land is out of reach. I am sure this is a “normal” feeling. Like many people, I am my own worst critic and I allow self-doubt to take control far too often. On the other hand, sometimes it feels like my Promised Land is my ability to help and serve others. So maybe I am already there! This is another aspect of my Moses Complex.

There are various complexes that psychologists claim can explain many human behaviors. We have heard of the Oedipus (forbidden sexual desires) complex, the Napoleon (lack of size or stature) complex, and the Superman (unhealthy sense of responsibility) complex. But is there a Moses complex? I did a little research to find out. It turns out that there is a Moses Complex, and I am not the only one who thinks about it. I stumbled upon a blog post by Dean Waggenspack that summarizes the Moses Complex perfectly (I encourage you to read it here). One line in particular stood out for me…

“But because Moses has the knowledge, experience, insight and leadership role it should be apparent to all others that they should follow him.” (Waggenspack, 2012)

This my friends is where my hang up lies. It is the core of my Moses Complex. People tell me that my teaching and writings is great- knowledge. I have been told I have a good combination of abilities and expertise- experience. I have people who trust me enough to ask me for advice and seek inspiration- insight. I have been put in countless positions where I have needed to guide and direct people and their decision-making processes- leadership. Therefore, “it should be apparent to all others that they should follow (me).”

The irony in all of this is we never know how many people actually “follow” our lead. It is impossible to know, especially in today’s social media driven society. Sure we can check our “likes” and “followers”, but how can we determine how many people take and apply the things we have to offer. For example, who knows what impact their generosity has on others? A wise woman once said if we knew the true impact we have on others, our heads would explode! So I guess it is best we don’t know. In my case…

  • Do I have a million “followers”?
  • Are people in countries around the world actively reading my blog posts?
  • How many people bought one of my books and referred it to one of their friends?
  • Is one of my motivational prints hanging in a frame in someone’s home or office?
  • What happened after someone used my advice and it worked for them?

If I knew the answers to these questions, maybe I could shed my Moses Complex. Maybe I am meant to show the way, but not to actually get to the Promised Land. Maybe I am meant to enter with those I am helping on their journey. Maybe I am already in the Promised Land. Maybe my head is about to explode!

 

Reference:

Waggenspack, D. (2012, December 12). Teaching– The Moses Complex [Blog Post]. Retrieved from https://deanwaggenspack.wordpress.com/2012/12/02/teaching-the-moses-complex/

Self-Reflection: Clark Kent vs Superman

Sometimes in life one must stop, take a self-assessment, and make necessary changes. I feel like I am at this point: the moment when you realize you need to take a look in the mirror to see who you really are.

Like many people, I can relate to characters in books, television, and movies. One character I always felt a connection to is Superman. Superman’s earthly journey started with humble beginnings as Clark Kent. He was just an “ordinary” person until he learned how to unlock his extraordinary abilities. He became Superman. Once Superman learned how to harness his power, he used it for good as a way to make things better. He eventually became great at everything he did, as long as he had his cape and super suit.

But Superman was really Clark Kent in disguise. Clark was the opposite of Superman in many ways. He was somewhat clumsy and socially awkward. He wasn’t very confident or sure of himself and his abilities. Clark seemed to want to reveal who he was, but every time he got the courage to tell his secret something got in the way. So he toiled in anonymity. In the meantime something strange happened: the intangible qualities he possessed as Clark Kent became as “strong” as the tangible qualities he possessed as Superman. So sometimes Clark wanted to be Superman; sometimes he wanted to be Clark.

Now you may be wondering how this well- known and beloved fictional character relates to this writer. Well I can relate to Clark Kent. I am cut from the same the clumsy, socially-awkward, unsure, and unconfident cloth as Clark Kent. I also learned how to unlock extraordinary abilities. Therefore, I am Superman too. My issue is learning how to harness my power and use my “super” powers for good.

What a lot of people miss is Superman has a complex. Superman wants to save the world, but sometimes he can’t. Psychologists have given this a title: the Superman complex. By definition, it is:

  • Superman complex– the feeling that others cannot perform one or more tasks successfully and sense of responsibility to save others

Superman feels he should be able to save the world. In one movie, he tried to perform so many life-saving deeds simultaneously that he did not have time to “save” the person he loved the most. This made him angry, and it caused him to question everything about himself and why he was given such extraordinary abilities. I can relate.

What a lot of people miss Clark Kent has a complex too. Clark Kent is torn between being “ordinary” and being super. My definition is:

  • Clark Kent complex– deciding how and when to use intangible qualities that go unnoticed or reveal tangible quantities no one knows exist

Clark Kent knows his intangible qualities make him great, but the world doesn’t. He also knows his tangible qualities as Superman make him great, but the world doesn’t. So he goes through life swinging back and forth. Clark Kent wants people to see that he is great. He wants to reveal who he really is, but without his super powers he can’t figure out how to do it. I can relate.

The world loves tangible qualities: good looks, physical appearance, wealth, material things. The world sees the “good’ in Superman. On the other hand, the world overlooks intangible qualities: care, compassion, helpfulness, love and support. The world does not see the “good” in Clark Kent.

Sometimes in life one must stop, take a self-assessment, and make necessary changes. I feel like I am at this point: the moment when you realize you need to take a look in the mirror to see who you really are.

Who am I? I am Clark Kent, but I am super too.